The Blood is the Life for 22-07-2017

Jul. 22nd, 2017 11:00 am
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In which My Doctor is The Best Doctor

Jul. 21st, 2017 06:54 pm
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I am well known for the fact that Colin Baker is my favourite Doctor when it comes to Doctor Who; possibly I am well-known for it because it is somewhat unusual*. The Other Baker has the biggest cohort of fans from classic era, I suspect at least partly because he is the longest serving, and my least favourite of the new era Doctors remains inexplicably popular among youngsters, perhaps because he's conventionally pretty. Us Colin fans are a small yet hardy bunch, and quite a lot of the time the rest of fandom treats us like we are A Bit Strange.

However, I cleave to my belief that Colin Is Best, and I would like to present to you two very different little bits of evidence that have been added to my Colin Is Awesome pile:
  1. My friend Andrew has been doing reviews and analysis of Colin's first season on the show, and in this piece he explains, in quite some detail, why one of the worst Who stories ever showcases exactly how brilliant Colin is in the role.

  2. Colin's incredibly robust reactions to the casting of Jodie Whittaker, even to the extent of retooling his own iconic regeneration line and becoming mildly impolite to a fellow former Doctor, has been a joy for me to behold. Colin has always been a Who fanboy, as well as a Doctor, and this response from him was just magnificent.
I don't expect to convert many - any - of you here. I know you've all got your views, and some of them are quite fixed, just as mine are on this matter. Nevertheless, it would be nice if fandom in general could have a bit less casual disrespect for Colin, and his fans. He's a good actor, and a fab Doctor, and we should all cherish him.



* for various demographic reasons, the cohort for whom Colin is Our Doctor is smaller than that for almost any other Doctor. If you want more on the maths of this, Andrew goes into it here.

Roxy and other animals update

Jul. 21st, 2017 02:15 pm
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Second course of antibiotics seems to have done the trick, so it appears the infection she had was a resistant strain, or at least resistant to the most common doggie antibiotic.

Now we have to sort out her teeth...

Daughter has been really excellent recently, alternately cajoling me into doing self care ("come on mummy, lets go to the gym, it's good for both of us" "Lets take the doggies for a walk, clear our heads") and baking cakes for me to eat. She's getting REALLY good at baking.

Pretty much everything else is still stressful or infuriating or depressing, but I'm not dead. And tomorrow we go to That London for a couple of days to see the wimmins krikkit world cup final, so hopefully running away for a bit will help.

The Blood is the Life for 17-07-2017

Jul. 17th, 2017 11:00 am
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The Blood is the Life for 15-07-2017

Jul. 15th, 2017 11:00 am
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Quick Update on previous post

Jul. 14th, 2017 11:53 am
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(here for those who missed it)

Roxy has a new course of different antibiotics in case the thing she has was resistant to the other antibiotics. If they don't cure it she might have to have x-rays and things. Once this thing is cleared up she needs to go see the doggy dentist again, too, which is a joy. She's probably going to have to have a couple of extractions.

Thanks to all who offered to send spoons (and gin). I have managed to slip a bottle of Opihr onto the Ocado order for Sunday, so I think I'll be ok.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH

Jul. 13th, 2017 03:14 pm
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My to do list has too many things on it and they all eat spoons and I have no spoons send spoons. Srsly.

Am managing to just about keep up with work stuff, but politics stuff is a bit wibbly wobbly and personal stuff is backed up like someone who's never eaten prunes.

Also, Roxy has finished her course of antibiotics, yet is still coughing (we're going back to the vet tomorrow); my ankle still hurts; Hol breaks up for the summer holidays tomorrow; we've got a meat order coming and the freezer is too full already; I've got research to do on policy for a Lord; I've got two reviews to write; I've got LOADS of stuff to do for LGBT+LDs; I've got loads of invoices to issue and forms to fill in (and forms are a terrifying thing); AND we are out of gin.

This is not sustainable.

(we now return you to your scheduled programming)

Life is a gorgeous, broken gift.

Jul. 11th, 2017 10:12 pm
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I lost a very, very old friend over the weekend.  The illness was sudden, acute, and ultimately fatal.  In less than a week, she was gone.

We weren't so close that her material absence will affect me on a daily basis.  I didn't see her often.  But I respected her, and she had an effect on who I am today. Without her I would be a slightly different version of me, not the me I am.

My own grief and pain is still daily, and pressing.  It's right and fair, it's proof I loved someone, and so it's not something I want to turn away from or bury.  I cared about her, and I am reasonably sure she cared about me, but this is nowhere near as devastating to me as it is for others who knew her better, saw her more, loved her in ways that I did not.  That hurts to see.  All the pain I can't help alleviate in any real way.

So it hurts, yeah, and it is frightening to know that someone so young could die so suddenly -- she was DECADES away from a reasonable age to go.  It's terrifying to watch this happen, knowing how helpless everyone was to stop it, seeing how it left everyone bereft, and how all of us, every one, is going to go through a version of this with someone they love.

That bit, the anxiety over the unavoidable future, is the part that's been hardest to cope with.  I know how to grieve, and grief is not unhealthy.  Anxiety doesn't help anyone.

So yeah, that's been a little rough.

I'm also doing some really hard work in therapy.  Working on old trauma that is holding me back.

And I'm doing some medical stuff that has also been difficult -- I'm over one of the big humps, and things are going so fucking well with that I can hardly believe it, but it was really stressful going in, and there is more difficult stuff ahead of me.  The goal of the therapy is to get me well enough to do it.  I'm not looking forward to it, but it's a thing I'd like to have in the rearview, not the passenger seat.  You know?

I am caught in the middle of a complicated and frightening life that is nevertheless very beautiful.  I am doing well, I am doing poorly, I am doing everything at once, feeling everything at once.  It's hard and it's easy, it's good and it's bad.  It's all so unstable.  All I know is that I don't care how fucked up everything is, I want to be here.  I am happy to be here.  This is a good place to be, even when it's terrible.  I very much want to live.  I am very glad to have a future again.

ETA: She was an organ donor, and that saved lives.  I have registered to become one.  I urge you to consider doing so as well, if you are able.

The Blood is the Life for 11-07-2017

Jul. 11th, 2017 11:00 am
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